must not spend! argh!

I have this thing about having money. I spend it. I don't what my problem is, but having money stresses me out. As soon as I get it, I start planning what to do with it (I got good with the $870 paycheck, I paid off most of my cc). Once it's spent, I feel relief. "Whew! I'm glad that's over... now I don't have to worry about it any more." I realize that this makes no sense at all. But I prefer the simple life, and having money and being a knitter are two things that combine to make more stress. There is just so much yarn out there, how can I be expected to choose?! So anyway, I've been destashing and have some $$ burning a hole in my pocket. Before you say anything, I took most of it out and will be using towards my CC and gas. But I left a little sitting in my paypal account for a rainy day

edited to say, I remembered that I'm expecting a final package from my SP, two Magic Balls from a co-op sometime in September, and a swap next week. I will not spend right now. No matter how bad I want that sea silk or peter rabbit by fleece artist... ;)